Top Ten Tips and Tricks for Better Parenting
Use the proper tone. Communication comes in various forms. Body language, actual words and the tone of voice to name a few. When communicating with your child use every possible form properly. Make eye contact, be near by and if it’s serious, speak seriously. Not mean or angry, but firmly. Take the emotion out of your voice and think about how you want your child to receive the information you’re about to share. Practice if you have to. It takes some getting use to but it sets both you and your child up for successful communication.
Speak in the positive when giving directions. “Sit on your knees or bottom.” Rather than “Don’t stand on your chair.” “Use a soft voice.” Instead of “Don’t yell.” Tell your child what you WANT them to do, not what you want them to stop doing.
If your child can do it, have them do it. If your child is old enough, strong enough, patient enough let them take on responsibilities in line with their capabilities. Never do something for them that they can do themselves. Have them try things with you there first, show them how to do it correctly the first time, be patient but firm. Making their bed, clearing their place, picking weeds out of the garden or flower bed, loading the dishwasher, folding and putting away laundry. If each of these things takes five to ten minutes, it could easily save you up to an hour a day as a parent.
Have a place for everything. If you have things sitting out everywhere, all over the place, you have too many things. If you have a place for everything and your child knows where things go, they can put them there.
Don’t buy your child junkie toys. Things that break are a liability to your financial and mental health. It breeds ungratefulness.
Feed your child less sugar. Be aware of how many grams of sugar/carbohydrates your child is eating in a day. Bread, pasta, juice, root veggies, crackers, fruit and milk all contain sugar.
Encourage alone time. Do not be your child’s entertainment 24/7. Tell them you are going to sit and read for 30 minutes while they play with their favorite toy. “You have half an hour to play with your LEGOs while I do some work. I’ll set a timer.” Or “I have some reading to do, you can play quietly with your trains. I’ll be right here on the couch if you need me.”
Lead by example in everything. Speak like you want your child to speak, pick up your things the way you want your child to pick up their things, hug and use loving language when it’s appropriate, be honest about your feelings.
Say what you mean. Be clear and to the point. Use fewer words. You can be polite but direct. Don’t drag it out trying not to hurt their feelings. If you say it firmly but kindly a statement is enough. “Fold that blanket.” “Turn off the computer.” Keep it simple and do not add “OK” to the end of a statement. “Put your toys away, ok?” Is a question and you are not going to like the answer. If you are asking, their answer will have to do. You are setting yourself up for conflict.
Do not ask questions you already know the answer to. If your three year old is hopping around, wiggling with their hands between their legs do not waste precious time asking if they have to go potty. You are the adult, you know the answer. Tell them, “Go potty and wash your hands right now.” Firmly and kindly.